Letter to Jane

Dear Jane,

Leaving Mr. Rochester must have been one of the most difficult decisions you've made yet. For that, I am so proud of you for sticking to your principles. Even after he told you how hard his life has been married to Bertha, how much he loved you and how happy he has been with you, you left. He said everything that he possibly could have to make you change your mind and stay, but as you have been all your life, you're too stubborn to be dissuaded by anyone. You easily could have gone with him far from Thornfield and pretended you had no problems, but your relationship with Mr. Rochester had already been tainted. You never would have forgotten about her even if the misery she caused Mr. Rochester were to disappear completely. He was deceived by her entire family; he was young when they got married and he expected a happy marriage and life with his wife but soon learned that that would never happen. I know that he nearly tricked you into marriage as well but it was not the same reason. His intentions were never to hurt you, he adored you and didn't want to lose you so he thought keeping Bertha a secret would salvage your relationship. He had already been fooled into believing Adèle's mother loved him and that he and Bertha would love each other. I don't think he ever thought of it as duping you and I doubt he ever laughed at your callowness or stupidity. But I also don't think I would ever be able to leave him as you did if it were me in your position and I think you were right to do so. To know when to put yourself and your needs in front of those of who you love is one of the hardest things to do. In a show I watch, Game of Thrones, Cersei Lannister, a very strong woman who is also cunning and evil enough to kill off her husband, tells her daughter in law, "The more people you love, the weaker you are. You’ll do things for them that you know you shouldn’t do. You’ll act the fool to make them happy, to keep them safe. Love no one but your children." Cersei worships the ground her children walk on because she refuses to love anyone else so she is absolutely devoted to them. Love can make you forget your own importance sometimes, it makes you unimportant because suddenly you're willing to do absolutely anything for whoever you love. You didn't allow this, you didn't left love become a weakness and you held true to your principles. Although you had no one to admonish you, you had expectations for yourself; you respect yourself and no one can tell you that is wrong. I promise you, you committed no fault in leaving Mr. Rochester and you should pride yourself for your strength.

Sincerely,

Brandice